applepipp - emotion coaching

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What is a growth mindset?

I have been considering private practice for some time.

My full-time job is fulfilling, interesting and provides great learning opportunities. As the service I work for has changed over the years, I realised that the most rewarding aspect of my practice is having the ability to engage children and young people and work collaboratively to bring about positive change for them.

I have been asked many times to recommend a therapist for a child or young person, there are limited opportunities in my local area. Due to the level of need the charities and local services have a sometimes complicated and lengthy referral process. Schools are often willing, but may lack the skills, resources or time. I believe early intervention is key, but availability of the intervention can be the challenge.

So, why I have I waited so long?

In my sessions I role model a growth mindset for children and young people. I explain the power of having a growth mindset. I supply school staff and parents with growth mindset advice and resources, lesson plans and assemblies. I coach and train others to be open. But whenever I considered developing applepipp, it was my own fixed mindset that held me back.

“I’m not ready.”

“I’m too busy.”

“I’m too tired.”

“I’m too needed at home.”

“I can’t do this.”

Until one day a good friend challenged me on my own mindset, my automatic thoughts and responses. I thank you for that, Anna.

My family supported my decision, “At last!” they said! “No more talking, let’s do this! We are here to support you.” My partner helped me setup this website. My sister offered advice on financial planning. My mum offered me a safe, private space to use as a therapy room. My family told me, “you can do this, we are excited for you”.

Finally my growth mindset had kicked in, and with help from my support network of family and friends, here we all are.

Let me tell you a bit about growth mindset, a concept developed by Carol S Dweck.


 If parents want to give their children a gift, the best thing they can do is to teach their children to love challenges, be intrigued by mistakes, enjoy effort, and keep on learning. That way, their children don’t have to be slaves of praise. They will have a lifelong way to build and repair their own confidence. – Carol Dweck

  • It has been suggested that there are two basic mindsets that shape our lives, growth mindset and fixed mindset.

  • “In a growth mindset, people believe their most basic abilities can be developed through dedication and hard work—brains and talent are just the starting point.” – Carol Dweck

  • “In a fixed mindset, people believe basic qualities, like their intelligence or talent, are simply fixed traits.”– Carol Dweck

  • Teach your child about growth mindset

  • Use questioning to support a growth mindset.  Give children the chance to explain themselves in a way which makes sense for them. 

  • Embrace challenges and teach children to love them.

  • Make making mistakes OK. Everyone makes mistakes - we can learn from them.

  • Praise the process and effort, not the person.

  • Identify the barriers, is it fear of failure? Comparing ability with others?

  • Tackle fear of failure by emphasising success, look for opportunities for positive specific praise and confidence building.

  • Highlight fixed mindset or avoidant behaviour and offer support, e.g. "You are doing X to avoid doing Y, have a go, what is the worst that can happen?

  • Consider and share past successes. Analyse what was different that made it a success. 

  • Foster an "I can" atmosphere at home.

  • Create a ‘safe’ environment, where children are encouraged to ask, and admit uncertainty. Promote the idea that it is ‘good to ask’ and ‘okay to fail’.

  • Show children that they are capable. Avoid "learned helplessness". Do not 'rescue' as this is unhelpful. Encourage attempts and reflective effort rather than the end product.  

  • Language is key, repeat phrases and develop growth mindset scripts you can rehearse for specific situations.

There are a range of growth mindset TED Talks suitable for children and young people.

You can find more reading and resources at these trusted sites, they are FREE to use.

CBeebies Growth Mindsets: Help your child try new things

Third Space Learning - Growth Mindset

Mindset kit-parents